Said one man to his ego….
(A dramatic piece filled with irony and truth.)
I am sorry we haven’t spoken for a while and I am sure you are feeling neglected. The thing is I have a bit of a dilemma.
I have been doing amazingly well, sorry my dear Ego, I should say, ‘we’ have been doing amazingly well. Of course we both want to celebrate our achievements and encourage other people to celebrate our achievements as well. We want to post selfies, update our status about all the fabulous places we have visited, update our CV, be seen at all the new bars in town, get complimentary tickets and tweet about how fantastic we are. But, Conscience is being grumpy. Conscience says that you and I are now a little ‘out of control’. She is worried that we are putting ourselves at risk by being so careless. I told her that unless we promote ourselves then no one is ever going to realise how wonderful we are and then of course no one will be jealous. If you are not making people jealous then surely life is not worth living. In fact I think even Conscience is a little jealous.
I think it is important to be generous with money to show people how much wealthier you are than them so they admire you. I think it is essential to boast about how many qualifications you have from international universities so they know how exceptionally clever you are. It is vital to show everyone the newest model phone that you have so that they respect you.
I know you will understand, Ego, you are the only one who speaks any sense. How can we appease Conscience and yet still get our own way?
Yours in adoration
Oh please – why on earth would we listen to conscience – she is a woman.
Yours in constant admiration.
Well said – let me update my status with a new selfie – I haven’t done that for a couple of hours.